Faced with a long list of changes that (in theory) will take my book from 'good' to 'brilliant', I poured myself a large glass of Cab Sav and wondered again why I want to be a writer.
Because seriously man, this itch to write is like a curse. On days like today, I feel sure that I could choose to do anything else: cake baking, hat-making, belly dancing...even cleaning fish and be more in control of the time it would take to deliver a satisfactory outcome.
I mean, here I am with a head full of words, characters waiting to be written, stories aching to pour from my finger tips to the lap top, yet this running-about-town busy-busy living makes it so hard. I am running into coffee shops, sparking up the laptop to tap out fifty words then going on to something else. Lord knows why I'm not the fittest person I know with all that nonsense. Even with a team of foot masseurs and secretaries I'd still be exhausted.
But what's the alternative? I've tried the full time writing gig and it don't work. The only good thing about that period in my life was, the amount of time I was able to spend with The Child...but then I began to worry about cash....
Still, life is full of choices. And I choose scribbling. Morning, noon and night. I just need an average of 5 more hours in the day to write and do my job properly. It's not too much to ask for in the general scheme of things. Some people want botox and boob jobs.
Really, there should be a law against anything that stands in the way of someone's dream. There should be a law and a prison sentence. Hell, there should be cruel and unusual punishment involving, chilli and eyeballs,jeering crowds and wild drumming, grandmothers begging for forgiveness and new mothers swearing to protect their babes from such evil....
Someone on WW, who is way smarter than me, put it very eloquently: Writing is all about Time Time Time. That and a thick skin. And patience. And a gift for story telling. And writing. And reading. And you know what? When I'm in the zone and the words are arranging themselves so that the story plays out like a film with life-like characters and every single detail in sharp relief? Hooyah! When it's as good as that? Then writing is da bomb.